GPS to a Joyful Marriage

I love studying Adam and Eve.  Their story reveals to us many clues about our human nature. Genesis 3: 4-5 says, “’You will not surely die,’ the serpent said to the woman.  ‘For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.’” The devil is enticing Eve to take the forbidden fruit, telling her she will not die from eating it.  God told Adam in Genesis 2:17 – “You must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die.”   God talks about immortality here.  Because of their disobedience, Adam and Eve would not live in the Garden of Eden forever. "You will not surely die."   Satan, on the other hand, was talking about immediate death – as in, the fruit wouldn’t kill them right then.  As humans, we tend to live in the moment with little thought about future consequences as Eve certainly did here. Satan went on to tell Eve that “Go...

How did we get here?   Have you ever looked at your spouse and wondered how you ever came to this place of disappointment, dissatisfaction, and bumpy roads in your marriage?   It sure isn’t what you thought marriage would be.   Oh, maybe you don’t feel that way every day, and if you’re fortunate, you’ve already surpassed those days of marital misery and live in peace and harmony in your relationship with maybe only a rare bump along the way.   We all go through the fire (hard times, storms) at some point in our marriages. (I’ve yet to meet a couple that hasn’t).  The good news is that the fire leads to purity and a wonderful place in our marriage we can only arrive at once we’ve figured out how to put out the fire. We have to stay in the fire and not give up until we figure it out, or we will never know the joy of marriage as God intended for us.   Marriage takes a lot of work, and unfortunately, “like it or leave it” seems to be the trend thes...

I’ve seen people, with their cruel words, their use of sex as a weapon, and their callous behaviors, unwittingly send their spouse into the arms of another.  Affairs are usually the final alarm in a marriage screaming that death is inevitable unless change is made.   We don’t usually make changes in our life until we hit a psychological dilemma – another term for a crisis. Continuing from Proverbs 5 (the adultress with honey dripping from her lips), verses 4-6 say, “But in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword.  Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave” Not a lot of good can come from an affair.  It will lead to the death of one relationship or the other.  Too many people are hurt by its outcome.  Often times, people in the midst of an affair can’t see clearly.  They know what they are doing is wrong, but for the moment, it’s a secret, intoxicating pleasure that clouds their idea of right....

I want to talk openly about something that is such a difficult subject for couples, and that is adultery.   Many look at it as the unpardonable sin and don’t hesitate to walk away if their spouse has strayed.  Yes, Moses gave acceptance to divorce when adultery was involved but only because the hearts of many of the Israelites had hardened.  But Jesus calls it how it is in Mark 10:4-12. “What God has joined together, let man not separate.”  He includes no exceptions here. In my eyes, there are two kinds of adulterers – 1. the kind that have no moral values, think nothing of it, and will repeat this crime over and over (they often come from a family of adulterers such as, the Kennedys), and  2. the kind that fall into it unintentionally because of a lack of intimacy in their marriage. I hate to ruffle some feathers, but it is not completely the fault of the adulterer for having an affair (unless they are the #1 adulterer.)  Adultery is simply a...